(Widdershins from the top: me, Jenny, elladorian, fordmadoxfraud; photo by onatopofthings.)
On the topic of last night's America's Next Top Model All-Stars, I can tell you one thing: Bre was robbed! Hold on, I am getting ahead of myself. You can see the group above-- sans Ryan, who took the photo, & sans fatbutts & James, who couldn't make it-- but you can't see what we were drinking. Apparently everyone recorded it in their ultra high-tech phone applications, which they've been keeping secret until now? Ryan brought a big growler of BFM/Terrapin Spike & Jerome’s which sure was odd; a little bit sour, a little bit cask! A little bit country, a little bit rock & roll. David & Maggie brought some Fire Island Pumpkin Barrel-- another entry into the seasonal category that didn't knock my socks off-- & there was still a tall bottle of Heavy Seas Great Pumpkin from last Television Night. I still preferred the Southern Tier Pumking-- I brought up the conflict over beer snobs who hate pumpkin beer &...well, & everyone else? & I feel like there is a perfectly reasonable middle ground, where you acknowledge that pumpkin beers lack subtly & sophistication, but they are still awesome. Anyhow, Pumking is utterly lacking in savoir-faire, but it has an earnest, in your face charm in its place. Before that, Jenny had cooked up some steak & brussel's sprouts, & we'd cracked open a cheap bottle of wine. So yeah, the fruit of Bacchus & the milk of Hathor were flowing. We started off with "The Satan Pit," a Tenth Doctor episode of Doctor Who. I guess I never did talk about "The Impossible Planet," either, the first part of the pairing. Good stuff! I'm starting to pick up the charms of the show, though I'm still not sold on the earlier series. Might take a bit more. The special effects are put to better use here; the Ood are great, the off-hand comparison of the space station to flatpack furniture helps explain its "BBC Budget"-looking appearance, & the CGI on The Beast was surprisingly skillful. Which isn't meant to be a backhanded compliment-- heck, I'd be impressed in 2011 if someone managed to make a giant satanic monster that didn't look like it was from a video game. Top Model...well, Top Model was a disaster, but finally a disaster worth yelling at the television about. It started with the Kardashians & a circus carousel. I'm not a big Kardashian hater, but fashion isn't the angle where I think their talents lie. On the flip-side, a client is a client! The gyre of the carousel was crazy, spinning too fast to be used properly, so everyone sort of skidded out. The final photo shoot was-- Michael Jackson themed! Featuring, for whatever reason, La Toya. Heck, I've already sloppily MSPaint 'shopped Michael Jackson into Top Model photos, so bring it on! Sadly, none of the shoots were a Captain Eo costume. The final analysis is this: Bre Scullark dominated that shoot, & the picture they picked for Bianca was a bad representation of her shoot, methinks. Still, Bianca is being painted in a weird way-- this time I actually think she's not the worst, though good heavens she is still a disaster. As a person, I mean. You can see her reputation getting her into trouble, & you can see the other girls happily scapegoating her. I wonder if it is for just generic "drama" or if it is going to be a bigger arc. Allison-- our wonderful Creepy-Chan, who somehow David had missed was a meme-- did fine, but her costume didn't demand much from her. Who ended up winning? Laura, maybe? Her shot was fine, but Bre's was better. & Bre was called near the bottom! & then La Toya decided they wouldn't send anyone home, which-- come on, kick Lisa off, please! Next week: Coco Rocha! Eek!