July 18th, 2008


convert or be converted!

is it just me, or do these wizards of the coast articles on converting your character bug anyone else? i mean, they don't make me angry, but they kind of exhasperate me. "how to convert your character" could mean a variety of things, but it shouldn't be a list of no-brainer arguments. "favored soul is kind of like a cleric, so just play a cleric!" or "war wizard is pretty wizardy-- just play a wizard!" now, okay, maybe some fourteen (14) year olds out there are just waiting for "official" word so they can print up this article & present it to their dms? but come on, really? really? if you want to actually make a helpful conversion article, just put a little elbow grease into it! "if you want to play a favored soul, well, the new cleric works pretty well, except for that whole getting wings. you can take a martial proficiency as a feat-- that works for the first part. as to the wings & all that, well, below we have an encounter, daily, & utility power that replicate it." how about that? how about you give a little blurb like "for the war wizard, we suggest dungeon masters let their player swap impliment proficiencies for weapon proficiencies." just a little bit of colouring outside the lines? because otherwise, all you are saying is "please refer to the book you already own, thanks for the page load." you know? no help at all. this is the sixth (6th) installment & they are all just treading water.
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(no subject)

some little troll of a guy came in here for a hilarious exchange. "do you have any indian books?" he asked me, after browsing our comic book section. what kind of books do you mean, sir? i asked him. "you know what i mean." i really don't. do you mean aboriginal americans or indians as in, the sub-continent? (my mind wandered, thinking of doggerland, as it has lately) "no. not indians like that." not like which? do you mean like, india? like indian authors or books about india? i usually assume when people dismiss options that they mean the first one-- people are dumb & rarely listen to everything you say. "no. i mean...porno."

?! i'd never heard anything like that. i turned to the former prince of pornographers, kingtycoon but he hadn't heard the euphemism either. jenny put forward the most plausible theory. she guessed that he meant the kama sutra, & thus just sort of extended that umbrella. i don't feel so bad about not being able to help that guy, since he was a creep (his feet make those sticky sounds like he's walked on the floor of pre-guliani jerk-off booths) but i guess that is what he meant. weird, though. now if only i can remember it & incorporate it into my own personal slang-- i'll just have to come up with pretenses for mentioning pornography. i added sociological images to my blog roll today, & generaljinjur & i have been talking about gender & video games a lot lately, so i'll come up with something.

in another note about doctor (dr) horrible..., i am pretty sure that the yogurt they are eating is from "yogo monster." which makes me feel like a horrible yuppie. that is the yogurt with all the cultures in it that agenesis made us eat with the rice-juju-bees. they opened a new branch up in park slope & maggie convinced me to go there, & it was...okay. dammit! & in other news, better news, marie sent me a review copy of her book cabinet of wonders just as i'm about to finish throne of bones. effing sweet.
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moria mask

identity horror.

throne of bones by brian mcnaughton.

came recommended to me by the faceless "they," & i really should know better. winner of the world fantasy award, whatever that is. since when do i listen to awards (besides the slipstream-- not that any slipstream novels are easy to get...)? it was summed up, both in a blurb i read & the back cover text, as being like what if tolkien wrote the sympathetic story of mordor. um? no it isn't. okay, i'm over-stating my dislike. it was okay. but it isn't like that at all. there are a few stories that are lovecraft meets tolkien. see, i mention this-- "a few stories." first off, it is a short story anthology! i don't really like short stories-- howard, lovecraft, borges aside.

anyhow, it is sort of hit or miss. i wonder if mister mcnaughton feels like he's being depraved, or realizes what window dressing that is? oh, casual discussion of rape! just rings hollow. though to be fair, points off for poor treatment of women & "lesser races," sir, & no resorting to "well, it is the turn of the century!" since this was written in the nineties (1990s). rape, necrophilia, cannibalism, okay, okay. spoooooky. really the works are all identity horror. the ghouls (he loves ghouls) eat people, take their memories, & then forget they are ghouls. think they are the people! then the same thing happens in reverse! are you a dream or are you the dreamer? so on, so forth. sometimes there is some interesting play? othertimes, not so much. there is a semi-coherent universe behind it; i like sort of reverse engineering the world out of the tales.
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