mordicai caeli (mordicai) wrote,
mordicai caeli

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so it turns out that my philosophy is that, if you ignore anything that comes in the mail, then it can't be bad. jenny doesn't share this opinion with me, & she says it is why i got evicted that one time. shows what SHE knows! i got evicted that one time because i didn't pay my rent for six months. but i'm also a follower of the magical trick that says that if you throw any semi-important-seeming paper or letter into a box? & then put that box in an attic somewhere? that if you ever get into a paper-trail of trouble, that box will magically fix it. like maybe the save the day letter is in there somewhere! this includes old paystubs, tax forms, credit card thingies, whatever. anyhow, SHE was saying i could let my biological mother throw the college era box out. which is the only box, since jenny keeps me from being a tragic mess here on the brooklyn shore. but she can'! because also, all of those envelopes probably have things scribbled on them. because i kind of compulsively jot down notes on pretty much any piece of perishable paper i can find. i then put that paper somewhere in the way of everything, like the middle of the kitchen table. i then REFUSE to move it. right now, for instance, there is a piece of paper next to me that says "you are filled with the crazy germ! it populates you! mouth cheese delicacy! unanimous vote against sanity. jeremiad. "it is like recipe for bisexualism!" & the other half of it is obscured by water damage. it also has math problems & schedule notes on it. this paper is sacred & can not be thrown away!

pointing out all this to jenny, she missed me. or missed being absolutely frustrated by this habit. which is the first phone call i've won versus her in a long time. like- this break is particularly sucky. everytime i call her, she's doing something better or at least better at distracting her attention. i'm all kinds of neglected! but keeping busy. & i don't know. i tried calling her every night at bedtime, like we used to when we were dating long distance, but it never worked out & so i gave it up. this isn't really a complaint, just a kind of bummer. i sometimes feel taken for granted, even when she's being my heroine. but ha ha! i won her that phone call. i'll keep that in my luck amulet.

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