jenny predicted that i'll get mad at her before too long, for with-holding affection. which is totally in character, true, but she's got a lot of slack since i am being super-boyfriend (forever), & because i was totally a dick to her. i mean, how is getting mad at her going to help me? if i get frustrated, i'll just channel it into, i don't know, arranging a symphony in her honor, or building a gingerbread house or something like that. anyhow, i am way more likely to become depressed & self-pitying first, get my sulk on. first i get hurt, then i lash out! comon! abandonment complex, right? isn't the pattern clear by now? clear like the waters of crater lake. but no! crisis-less. ho ho, i am jolly as old st. (saint) mordicai. i will woo, i will charm, i will wait patiently for her to want me. i just want her to want me like a cheap trick. man i miss her. i'm like a cosmonaut stranded in orbit. bring me home mother russia, bring me home pravda.