mordicai caeli (mordicai) wrote,
mordicai caeli

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okay, i guess my plan was to stay home today, since apparently jenny n' me are going to rock shakespeare & co. on sunday. the big premise of staying home today is finally doing fucking laundry, since i am literally out of fucking clothes. i mean, besides pants. i'm on the team that says you can wear the same pair of jeans about a million times in a row. fun fact- the reason i do it is because of some girl named lisa foster! whatever that girls story was! like- i had that friend-crush thing on her? i mean, i wanted to hang out with her a whole lot. sometimes she'd get mad at me because i had a crush-crush on katie s. & she probably thought i was creepy, because uh, i'm creepy? also, the friend-crush thing is creepy, even though i get it all the time. anyhow, one time i said something shitty to lisa foster & she said something mean to me about katie, except my being an asshole was on accident, & she was totally right about katie. so i should've listened to her! if i could get in a time machine, i'd be all "yo, little mordicai! that girl is like a lame version of paltrow from the royal tenebaums!" & lil' me would be "word up? big me, take me home with you & clone yourself (since you are from the future) & the lonely won't seem so big." then i'd sadly tell him "it don't work that way, sluggo. sorry." then i'd get in my time machine & go meet a dinosaur.

so i have no clean socks (not even dress socks! i wore those, too!), boxers with no elastic, & um, not a single fucking shirt (button up shirts have been worn at least twice, once with a wife-beater underneath, once without). so i need to get my clothes washed, but i'm not good for any-fucking-thing today. you know how in ghostbusters, new york city is all getting its ass kicked by ghosts once that small-dicked guy opens the containment unit? thats what it is like for me. except insead of slimer, i get lisa foster, which is a pretty awesome trade. not to diss slimer, but lisa foster was pretty okay. i heard she was getting it on with that one weird hot androgynous guy, i think. so good for her. i guess.

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